A Christmas Tale


Here Comes Christmas

There is simply no stopping it! I know, I tried. I don’t think there is any other holiday that causes as much stress, has a super high price tag, and leaves us totally exhausted. It’s time, once again, to begin our never ending search for that perfect present.

Like many others, I swear every year to get a jump on it and finish early. In my dream world I will have purchased every gift, have them wrapped to perfection, the house will be spotless and decorated to rival Martha Stewart, and I sip wine by the fireplace, awaiting the arrival of guests for my gourmet cooked Christmas dinner. Then reality sets in!

It’s Christmas Eve morning and time to begin the insane shopping and cooking. By 6pm I’m drinking the wine straight out of the bottle! The fireplace part of the dream deserted me just as the fire engine pulls away from my house. Seems you have to open the flue before lighting the damn thing. Memo to self, don’t play with matches.

All the “good will toward man” bonhomie leaves us as sweaters go on sale for 50% off at the local mall and there is only a half dozen left. This could get ugly if one more person steps on my foot. Next year I will get an early start.

And If one more person tells me, in the month of July “Oh yes, I just finished my Christmas shopping and everything is wrapped.”, I will have no holiday worries as Big Bertha and I commiserate behind bars, awaiting trial.

So, unless you want to join me and my new best friend, Big Bertha, give some thought to getting a start on this years holiday madness.

Ho, Ho, Ho!

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